“When we say that a man controls himself, we must specify who is controlling whom” – BF Skinner, psychologist, 1953
Ignore terrifying questions. Who are you? Why? Che vuoi? Что делать?
Likewise, ignore the past. Memory is the detritus of thought, and should be buried or sterilised accordingly.
Love is more usefully understood as a noun, not a verb. It is positive affect. It is a pleasant affective achievement that you can possess by correcting your beliefs, with or without a partner.
Let your expert or technician manage you until you feel confident enough to self-manage.
Suffering is pathology. The product of wrong thinking. It is not suffering, per se, just distortion, dysfunctional negativity. Job was irrational. Ecclesiastes did himself no favours.
Become the agent of your own subjection. Monitor yourself. Regulate yourself. Record your observations in a diary or app. If you cannot obliterate your subjectivity, at least try to quantify and correct it.
Treatment is evidence-based, as defined by scientific experts, technicians.
All crime is pathological.
Wracked with grief and ambivalence? Boost your self-esteem. Comply with homework, medication.
Pro-actively promote the methods of your efficacy. Like Amway. Like the American Way.
Your relationships are disintegrating? Be self-actualised. Grow. Hold a positive, rational opinion of yourself. Be sure to appraise others on an empirical basis. Be mindful. Be pro-active, pro-social. There are scales to assess agreeableness.
Treatment can be understood as palliative care. Palliative derives from palliare, to cloak.
Think healthily. Events are neither more nor less than your beliefs about them.
Your proclivities can be defined against the national average, allowing for sex, race and level of educational attainment, and are free to fluctuate freely within two standard deviations of the mean.
Experts and technicians determine the threshold for and type of intervention, from peace-keeping missions to pre-emptive strikes.
It is a requirement that you maintain healthy habits. Remember, pathology is criminality. It is dysregulation.
Think of yourself as an object or image, then persuade yourself to hold a high opinion of that object or image. Think of your problems as incidental or external to you, and as something to be accepted and subsequently regulated.
Try to channel your despair into productive outlets. Exercise that improves your appearance. Activism at shareholder meetings. Peaceful protests. Letters of complaint in the appropriate pro forma, in triplicate. Contact your local HR department.
Become unified. Ignore the divisions within yourself, if you cannot abolish them altogether. Purge yourself of cosmopolitan elements. If an idea is not healthy, productive, useful, then you probably do not want to know about it.
Health can be measured in utility. In productivity.
Empirical technicians are solving more problems every day. There are no more refugees in camps, swallowing razorblades as they die in heat and excreta. No more dead-eyed sectionees, lobotomised by neuroleptics. Only clients. Service users. Consumers.
Treatment is standardised. As it is for all, so it is for each. So it is for you.
Well-being is being fungible oneself, and maintaining a fungibility of positive affective-partners.
Be productive, functional. Be empowered (as a consumer).
Test your beliefs for realism (as defined by a scientific expert or technician). Seek total self-control.
Anxiety is a gaping chasm , a void that engulfs your world? Here, have a breathing exercise.
Treatment is scientific, efficacious.
Deregulation in finance and labour markets. Socially appropriate emotional regulation in the libidinal economy. Health is adaptation, flexibility. Resilience (to abuse, exploitation, poverty).
Love and radicalism in all of its forms will make you sick. Stick to pro-social attachments that affirm the self. Your partner, your family, your collective is only as good as you feel.
Distract yourself with pleasant thoughts, activities. Practice hygiene and sterility at all times. For appropriate sleep hygiene, please refrain from using your bed for reading, sexual activity, thinking or dreaming.
Enhanced productivity requires enhanced hygiene. Its absence caused swine flu, for instance.
Avoid spicy foods as you would all intoxicants. Consumables which cannot be assimilated or to which you are intolerant should be avoided.
You are only as good as you feel. Choose a belief system that makes you feel positive. There are many in the marketplace. You will know if your life is good as you will experience a pleasant affect.
To think of death is irrational, and anyway, it cannot be quantified.
Tormented by unfulfilled sexual longing? Schedule a pleasant activity. Movies, light comedies. Walk in a park devoid of dog excreta. Easy-listening music. (Some experts permit the use of adult contemporary).A bath with candles. For one.
If you cannot comply, we have legislation for emergency measures.
Treatment is educative.
Treatment as a mentoring program for the surveillance state.
Treatment as a finishing school for post-modern capitalism.